Thursday, April 30, 2015

His and Her Chores

Wahoo!  I can now say I am experienced at mowing the lawn with both a push mower and a riding mower.  I cut for ages today on the new John Deere and the yard looks fabulous.  We have 10 acres.  I didn't come close to getting it all, but I made a good dent in the area around the house.  I have loads of offers for help with the cutting including from my parents who live right next door.  They help as much as Rudy will let them.  Rudy still hopes to get going on it again, but for now, he's weak as a kitten.

Rudy and I have divided our around the house chores ever since we were married.  I only remember mowing the grass once during all this time.  Truthfully, mowing looks like fun (way better than cleaning toilets or doing dishes) but I never wanted to learn because I could barely keep up with the jobs that had become mine.

Now that Rudy is unable to do his jobs, I have had to take them on and it's been really hard. It's not hard just because of the increased work.  It's hard because I am clueless about so many things.  I didn't know how to start a mower.  I don't know where he keeps manuals or keys.  I don't know which gas is used where.  I think some things use special gas but I don't know which things.  He has lots of gas cans but none are labeled so I don't know which gas might be special.   I don't know the medicine routine for our pets.  I could go on and on.  And for the record, if I were the one who was sick, Rudy would be clueless about just as many things.

I am not looking for sympathy here. I'll figure things out eventually.  Rudy will help me when he can.  Right now, he's too weak to even explain much.  My parents will help.  Our friends and family will help.   You Tube is a lot of help.  And no matter how hard what I'm doing feels, it doesn't come close to what Rudy is dealing with.

My main reason for making this point is for my married friends who may be living "divided lives" when it comes to chores.  Take the time to learn more about the things your partner does.  There are so many circumstances that could come up where the knowledge could prove invaluable.