I'm sure many people are perplexed about the location of the get-together in honor of Rudy. Rudy and I live on the south side. We have many friends and family on the south side. What's the deal? And why no service?
First of all, I am not skipping a service because I'm flat broke. I haven't paid all the medical bills yet, so I guess I could be broke, but if so, I don't know it yet. Still, money did not enter into any of my decisions in this matter. Not even one little bit.
Rudy and I were never traditional. I couldn't bare the thought of a traditional service. I have been to some really nice ones in the past, but I wanted something much more casual and more importantly, I know Rudy would think this is perfect. Some of you may remember, Rudy and I ran off and got married because we got so nervous about the whole big wedding thing. Seriously, we are not traditional!
The May 16th get-together is up in Sugar Hill, which is a long unpleasant trek across town for many of our close friends and family. I did not do that to exclude anyone!!! Anyone who wants to come is truly welcome. If you need an address or more details, send me a message or give me a call. Or call Linda or Nancy or my sister or parents. Give us a few days to gather all the info.
This decision made perfect sense, actually, for what I am hoping will happen. I think the Sugar Hill get-together will not have too big of a crowd. It's not a service to bring closure. I don't think I'll ever have closure. It will likely be mostly Rudy's aunts, uncles, cousins, nieces and nephews. I imagine many people we love - both friends and family - will choose not to attend, and that's really OK. Again, to be perfectly clear - anyone who WANTS to come is welcome!, but please don't feel like you are letting me down if you opt out!
After the 16th, I'm going to have to start figuring how how to live without the man I've been married to for 36+ years. During that time, there were very few days we were apart. I have been part of a team - half of "Rudy and Denise". Most of my conversations included the words, we and us and our. I think the best way to keep from sinking into a dark place is to spend way more time with the people I love and to surround myself as often as possible with as much love as I can. So, if you aren't at the May 16th get-together, then please - let's get together soon! Come by the house. Let's go to a movie. Let's have lunch or go for a walk. I'll need a hug and a few laughs, please.